| hmmm, this life.... cant explain |
[Aug. 2nd, 2004|10:12 am] |
here it is 24 days till school. i hate school. and i hate thinking about what i'm suppose to do when i graduate.
the other night i got stranded downtown santa rosa untill 2 in the mourning and this girl that i thought i hated came and got me. it was the weirdest situation. i was so worried cuz i was in santa rosa with one, seems like my only good friend these days, he had to go pick something up and got jacked. i was waiting for hours. so worried. cant trust anyone. trust is worth nothing to me anymore. i miss my inoccent childhood. i hate the situations i get myself into. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 13th, 2004|11:00 am] |
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everyone, summer is almost gone. before we know it we will be sitting bored infront of a teacher, once again. just sitting there. not even listening. grasp it whail you can. i've wasted my time with usless people. santa rosa sucks. i hate it. ~~~~~ everyone watch love acctually. its good. i swear. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 18th, 2004|06:11 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | devious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | who else... LED ZEPPELIN | ] |
MMMmmmMMm friday!!!! but is it more then its cracked up to be? mmm crack.... jk ;D gezz u guys lossen up!!! santa rosa is crap i want out! no more gettho partys! i want back into sebastopol...
Anywhom~~~~ sry for wasting a moment of your life with crap.
;*
IF YOU LIKE PINA COLADAS! GETTIN CAUGHT IN THE RAIN! IF YOU LIKE MAKIN LOVE AFTER MIDNIGHT......hmm kindda make you want a pina coloda, doesnt it?
p.s Johny Depp is my bloody hero.
<><><><><><><<><><><><>*<><><><><><><><><><><><><><< |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 14th, 2004|10:18 pm] |
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***********Took some pictures over the past few days and im trying to figure out how to post them on the internet so that i can put some on here. im computer retarded, help! *******************
I was also wondering if anyone likes 311 and The Roots, becuz they play at the greek theater next sunday and i need one more person to go!!! it will be a good concert i promise. call me if you can come. ;D
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| WHOOOO HOOOO!!!!!!! |
[Jun. 11th, 2004|02:26 pm] |
***************************************** Schoooollllsss out for summer. Schoooollllsss out for ever! Sittin` in class is a pain in the neck Hows about me taking a three year raincheck Gonna do what I want don`t wonna graduate Gonna take a break from everything that I hate Hey there teach I`m talking to you You can`t tell me what to do! Schools out for the summer Schools out for ever Schools blown to pieces Head strain - brain drain School is such a pain! No tears - all cheer We want out of here! Don`t care `bout no popularity crown The prom king an` queen are just a couple of clowns We can read an` we can write What we need to know is where`s the party tonight Hey there teach I`m talking to you You can`t tell me what to do! Schools out for summer (Wonna take a vacation from education) Schools out for ever (Getta qualification in relaxation) No more pencils, no more books No more teachers, dirty looks Out for summer Out `til fall We might not go back at all Schools out for the summer Schools out for ever Schools blown to pieces Schools out for the summer
~~~Pink Floyd ************************************************
***HEALTH & HARMONY*** Keller Williams preforms on sunday!!! GOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOG!!!!!!!
<><<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> yesturday was the best day of the year, finally school is out. i went with my bro to one of his friends out for a BBQ, all i gotta say aboot that is...hippies r really funny drunk.
I LUV PINK FLOYD! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 9th, 2004|07:38 pm] |
Who is this person i've lost myself to? every morning i wake up with faith that i can surrcome what she is telling me to do. unfortanettly i lose that voice somewhere throughout the day. by the time night falls and i sadden myself to sleep, i find that my faith dropped. right through my grasp. as if there is a hole in this pocket i have. why couldn't i dobble stich the seams? why didnt i think about that? i miss my young self. so innocent. so pure, and way too niave. i should have stopped myself from sin much earlier in the game. isnt that all life is? a game? no, no, no. i look and look. trying so hard to find love within the world. out of 6 billion people,i cant see a single strand of hope for this world god put us on. i look for love in this town i live in. but in the end all i find is hate. life isn't an adventure,at least not to me. not anymore. Its mer strand of hope divouerd by hate. i've come to a conclusion... LIFE IS HATE. ~nothing more. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 31st, 2004|12:45 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | confused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fuse/ afi | ] |
going under? nah, im already there.
the other day my friend. scratch that. this girl i know called me crying. me being the person i am should have hung up. i dont make people happy. she called expecting to get a confident answer on how her life will get better. hahaha, nice try girlie. it wont.
all you gotta do is play the game this world gives you. sit through it till you die. get up in the morning, make money, go to school.
my friend that goes to bording school is back for 5 days b4 he leaves for Tiwan, jappan, where every hes going somewhere over there. i havent seen him yet, but i dont really care much. to tell you the truth i f i never had to see another male life form ever again. i'd be fine with it.
i'm happy to have a few real friends. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 26th, 2004|05:32 pm] |
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im excited! my friend that is in a bordin school right now, bcuz his evil parents sent him there, is coming to visit day after tomorrow~ hope to have lots o' fun tis weekend!!! 9 more days till summer!!!!!!!! ;) LOVE PEACE & HAIR GREASE |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 17th, 2004|12:08 pm] |
2 advil 2dayquil 8 tylnol whats left of the nyquil a 40 oz. of mickeys and a bong ripe later....
passed out so scared wanting so badly to die and wanting to die even more for not just doing it so numb and tinglie cant breath not even dreaming lieing there so scared notknowing want to do even now nothing can be done |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 5th, 2004|11:27 am] |
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Hmmm. im excited. i talked to a friend of mine that i havent talked to in awhial. its such a relife. like a wieght has been lifted. i missed her. anyhow. im sooo excited for the distillers concert! fun for sure. lol. u all better be going.
~~~~~~~~~~~HAVEAGREATDAY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 28th, 2004|11:07 am] |
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i dont understand life, and why it brings people so much pain. i applad all whom makes others think they are happy. they are the ones that blind the world to complete distruction. i dont try to push people over the edge. it just happens. and i never know if they are really talking about me. it would be so much esier if they would confront me with their problems they have with me. im an open minded person. i know im wrong 80% of the time. you just need to tell me so. ~ i've pushed away all my friends. the ones i was there for.the ones that i helped. maybe it was me that made it that way. and they were used to that. but when i needed them most they left me there to cry all by myself. that made me think, would they leave me to bleed all by myself in a puddle of my own blood? i dont belive in true friends, i belive in the temporary company of a soul content in flesh. but in the end everyone should know that every single one of thoughs souls have been trained to do only for themselves. even if their brain is telling them to do the right thing, their consious will only lead them where it truly wants to go. Mine does, and i dont fight it anymore. im sorry if you feel i have betrade you in any way. i've done it to many others before. but not intentionaly. i just wanted you to know. |
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| Too much |
[Apr. 27th, 2004|10:29 am] |
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why is it so hard for you to let it be, and let them be. dont you see your the source that is tering them apart? obiously you do, but you dont care. thats what you want. thats the type of person you know you are. couldnt wait, could you? |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 21st, 2004|08:24 pm] |
Had dinner with my mom tonigt.not something that happens alot. it was nice no yelling. that hasnt happend in awhail. i miss her. i mean i cant miss what i havnet had, but sholdnt there be more? come back home.. please? <><><><>><><><><><><>><<<<<><><<><><>>><><><><><<<<><><>< disspointed looks/ akward scilence.
()(()())()()())(()(()(())()()()( what do u mean? "you dont deserve her?" ~~ITS KILLNG ME INSIDE. |
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| dot care no more |
[Apr. 21st, 2004|03:04 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crushed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the river | ] | i have to see u sill. whispy and full. you left me with less than a good bye.
what was that you were sying? about being to good for her?
ditched once again... i happens. |
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| introverted :( |
[Apr. 20th, 2004|04:22 pm] |
i'm not happy and i dont know why. &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& i dyed my hair, that was exciting.
called you again, didnt pick up. thats ok i'll call another. ````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````` dont cry rebecca...i'll be there |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 19th, 2004|11:48 am] |
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Sitting here, not looking for more to put in my life. for i know thats just a wast of time. knowing that amber is the color of your energie. trying to blind my iner sight to what i really want. not wanting to want what i cant have. |
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| its a nice day for a white wedding... |
[Apr. 18th, 2004|04:30 am] |
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my sister got married yesturday, she was so happy and beutiful. and her now husband sooo happy to be with her too. i became an instant aunt and my mom a grandmother. what do i think of this? it doesnt matter. the relationship is about them and about them being happy together. so many people tryed to interferre with their relationship. tried to brake them apart from each other. but now they all see how happy they make eachother. when i see them together, it just works, everything clicks. even when they are mad at each other. i now belive in miricals, to see them come through so much and ignore everything that was being said by others. all that matters is that they are happy together becuz its about them and noone else.
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how coud she be so inconsiderate of my feelings, i dont belive in useing alcohol as an excuse for what one has done, or does. thats the stupidest thing. all it does is make you more outgoing. that doesnt mean it give you a pass to forget everythin that you have been told. she has no right to get upset with me, yet she find the stupidest things to get pissed about. i hate that, and sometimes i hate her. ---------i also hate him. forever mine, then strays away. im telling you, everyong is out for themselves, so grab all you can and run inocently as if you hadnt done a thing. becuz thats excatly what everyone else is doing. |
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| Foolish Games |
[Apr. 14th, 2004|03:37 pm] |
*************************************
You took your coat off and stood in the rain You were always crazy like that I watched from my window Always felt I was outside looking in on you
You were always the mysterious one With dark eyes and careless hair You were fashionably sensitive, but too cool to care Then you stood in my doorway, with nothing to say Besides some comment on the weather
Well in case you failed to notice In case you failed to see This is my heart bleeding before you This is me down on my knees
CHORUS These foolish games are tearing me apart Your thoughtless words are breaking my heart You're breaking my heart
You were always brilliant in the morning Smoking your cigarettes, talking over coffee Your philosophies on art, Baroque moved you You loved Mozart and you'd speak of your loved ones As I clumsily strummed my guitar
You'd teach me of honest things Things that were daring, things that were clean Things that knew what an honest dollar did mean So I hid my soiled hands behind my back Somewhere along the line I must've gone off track with you Excuse me, think I've mistaken you for somebody else Somebody who gave a damn Somebody more like myself
CHORUS
You took your coat off and stood in the rain You were always crazy like that |
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